TibKat's Insight's

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Feminist Mormon Housewives


Last night Jim and I were at dinner with Angela and Marc (my best friend here in AZ and her husband). We had gotten on to the subject of religion and Angela had mentioned she had come across the Feminist Mormon Housewives from Sarah’s blog and that she had found something interesting on it, the title alone I would think.

This morning after checking email and sorts I went blogging… I came across a post from that same site and wanted to share with you my comments that I had after reading it and one part in particular...

“All of us (even me, the most sheltered of good Mormon gyrls) know good decent moral people, people who wouldn’t pull the wings off a fly, who have had sex outside of marriage.It is hard for me to believe that these basically-good people have committed a far more grave sin than say, a faithfully married couple who spent their lives bilking elderly people of their life savings.
It just doesn’t fall out right on my conscience-ometer.”

(This was the comment I posted, in paticular because of the comment above)

I am new to your site. I am here because of my sister has a link to a blog that has a link to your blog. I am not Mormon but… I was raised in the church and most of my family is still a part of it. I preface this so that you might have a bit of background on me and where I am coming from.

My parents divorced when I was a senior in high school. They were married in the Mesa, AZ temple and had eight children together. My father “fell in love” with some one else after 25 years of marriage to my mother.

My “conscience-ometer” feels that the people who choose to have an affair or “fall in love” outside of their marriage is right up there with the gravest of sins or the ultimate wrong to their loved ones. I believe that God is a forgiving God in all matters when one truly seeks his or her forgiveness but it is the rest of us who have to live with the after math of the choices that the adulterer has made.

It is the child that is left with the broken home. It is the spouse that is left to fill the void inside them that in some way may be with them for the rest of their life. It is your family and friends, your neighbors and even co-workers who try to help pick up the pieces because it affects you in so many ways that you are unaware of. The sadness that surrounds your house turns into a black hole. You trust less and your faith wanes. Your outlook on life is never the same because of the selfish one and the choice that he or she made.

In hindsight it also contributed to me and my husband from getting together for almost twenty years. The same year that my parents divorced I “sent” him on his mission. I was so in love with this man but I was so lost in the pain and anger of “families are forever” that I vowed to myself, it won’t happen to me. I wrote him a Dear John while he was out and pushed so hard to never look back. Now at thirty-five we are married and so lucky.

We do recover, we are resilient but we are never the same.

No matter the degree of “sin” you give to adultery it affects everyone and damages us all permanently.

On Sarah’s blog she has a link to her friend in NY, http://lollygaggering.blogspot.com/ who has a link to http://feministmormonhousewives.org/

Check them out; there are so many interesting people out there.
posted by TRACI at 11:52 AM

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